Global Body Speak: Ethnic, Cultural and Gender Differences

You think the meeting with the overseas client went well but did it? In the final of our three part series Joy Aimée investigates the subtleties and potential pitfalls of body language on the global stage - with some surprising results.

At last! After months of wooing two Directors of a large Japanese company, Sally is invited to meet them while they are in town. Feeling confident that they are ready to be 'crunched,' she arrives punctually at ten, wearing her freshly pressed black trouser suit and red power shirt.

Over tea and cakes in the coffee shop of their hotel Sally tells them all about her organization and why she would like their business. She remembers to use open, friendly body language and she insists they call her by her first name. She makes frequent eye contact with both men, although it is difficult at times because they seem quite shy. Unfortunately she isn't able to accept their invitation to lunch but she politely explains that she has back-to-back meetings all afternoon. They can see how busy she is when she receives an urgent call from a supplier and gives him an earful for letting her down last month. After saying goodbye and shaking hands with both men, Sally tells them she will give them a call once they are back in Japan.

Whose Perception is Reality?
All in all, Sally is pleased with the meeting. That is, until she makes the call to Japan a week later and discovers the receptionist will not put her through to either man. She leaves a message. Two days later she leaves another. She sends a follow up email. No response. Eventually she realizes they are not going to contact her. Why? What went wrong and how does Sally ensure it never happens again?

Never Assume
Sally's first mistake is to assume that the body language she successfully uses to do business in the West is appropriate when dealing with clients from another culture. Because she makes this assumption she makes her second mistake, which is failing to do any research about the Japanese and how they do business.

According to Bridgit English, whose career in IT has taken her all over the world, Sally should also have checked out how women are viewed in Japanese society and moderated her appearance and behavior accordingly. Bridgit says, "Body language differences tend to be religious/cultural and gender based. As a woman working in a primarily male dominated global environment, I have needed to be more attentive to the subtle nuances of gender in order to win credibility without being overpowering. The three main areas of body language I focus on are voice, gestures and most importantly, dress code."

Moto Waters is Japanese and one of Queensland's top selling female real estate agents. The majority of her deals are with Japanese clients. She says that even after many years in the property industry, some men are still reluctant to do business with her. To counter this, she says she "keeps talking" to show how knowledgeable she is about the property market. She dresses appropriately, in a feminine yet conservative style, usually a dress or skirt and jackets. She never rushes meetings with Asian clients, as she knows it is important to take time to develop the relationship. She also says the Japanese are taught to 'hold face' and not show their emotions, even if they are feeling very angry or unhappy. 1.

Sally's Report Card
Armed with Bridgit and Moto's advice, it is easy to see where Sally went wrong. Firstly, although she was well groomed, she wore trousers when a skirt and jacket might have been a more astute choice. Secondly, she was overly friendly and familiar. As a society, the Japanese are more formal in the way they approach and address others. Sally's insistence that the men call her by her Christian name would have been regarded as inappropriate and even disrespectful. She then unwittingly added to the impression that she was brash by making direct eye contact. Japan is one of the few societies where making eye contact is regarded as intrusive and rude. As young children Japanese are taught to focus on the neck of the person to whom they are conversing. Next, her forthright conversation with her supplier would have been interpreted as very aggressive. Finally, her refusal of the lunch invitation because she was too busy would have implied she regarded her other meetings as more important than doing business with these men, causing them to 'lose face.' If Sally really wanted these new clients she should have re-scheduled the other meetings or delegated them to other staff members. This would have illustrated the value she placed on the new relationship.

Brindha Gunasingham, Managing Director of FitzBiz, a global Economic and Financial Research organization, says that Japanese like to take time to forge new relationships and this is often done over a meal. Despite her Sri Lankan upbringing, Brindha says she was slow to understand that many Asian clients take a long time to get to the point. Brindha now realizes that this is an essential element in them feeling comfortable before doing business with you. Accordingly, she now makes adjustments to her own pace and schedule to accommodate longer meetings with these clients.

Because Sally was focused on 'crunching' the deal she talked too much about what she wanted, in the process appearing aggressive and impatient. If she had been prepared to invest some time - or even known that 'making haste slowly' was the way to proceed, she could have gained the clients' respect and trust.

Far from being manipulative or game playing, this is actually about honoring and respecting the boundaries of others and using body language to create a feeling that both parties are speaking the same language.

What Language Are We Speaking?
It seems that gender is still - and possibly always will be - a factor to take into account in doing business. Not only are males from many cultures still reluctant to deal with women in authority, some, for example, Orthodox Jews and Moslems, have religious prohibitions that cannot be ignored. Orthodox Jewish men and Moslem women are both forbidden to be alone in a room with a member of the opposite sex, even if that other person is a client or their boss.

It works the other way as well. Several women interviewed for this article said that only in Australia have they experienced males focusing on their anatomy or even - according to Brindha - checking her ring finger to see if she is married. Deborah Barit, who runs Impressive Interviews in Sydney, much of this chauvinistic behavior is not prevalent amongst younger Australian men who have more enlightened views about gender roles.

Around the World: Global Body Speak at a Glance
Making eye contact means sincerity in most parts of the world while failure to meet someone else's gaze when speaking implies disinterest, lack of confidence, insincerity or shiftiness. However, in Japan, listeners are taught to focus on a speaker's neck to avoid eye contact as it is considered impolite. In most cultures it is therefore appropriate to make brief, yet frequent, eye contact. Holding this contact for longer than three seconds can be considered intrusive, aggressive and domineering.

Nodding one's head up and down signifies assent or agreement in Western cultures but in some parts of India means disagreement. A sudden head tilt backward movement means "No" in Greece and Saudi Arabia, while in Ethiopia, it means "Yes." In the West this gesture is regarded as a sign of arrogance, superiority and disdain.

Both men and women in Middle Eastern and Southern European cultures use hand gestures freely and expressively but in Asian cultures, gesticulating is more restrained. Making a circle with thumb and forefinger is a sign of approval in the West but is considered an insult and obscenity in many parts of the world. In Greece a raised middle finger means good luck but in the rest of the world it is considered obscene. If in doubt, use hand gestures sparingly and make them open palm movements. Women should always avoid the praying or hands clasped in front of the chest gesture, as men will interpret this as a plea for help.

Hands-on-hips is a sign of anger and seething rage in Malaysia and the Philippines. African American women use it to show anger, disgust and disagreement. In the West, in the less aggressive akimbo position, it is seen as a sign of confidence and willingness to take action.

Paralysis Through Analysis
Confused? Don't be. As long as you have done your homework and approach the client with genuine respect and a desire to understand their communication modus operandi, the rest will follow. If in doubt, err on the side of caution by reducing any natural exuberance, especially with hand gestures. Following the client's lead and even mirroring their actions is a useful technique for learning what is appropriate as well as for building empathy. Above all, be natural, confident and professional. If you have trained yourself to have body language that supports your verbal message that consistency will be conveyed and the client will see you as credible.

Sometimes too much knowledge can be confusing and too much analysis can lead to paralysis. Remember, that people are human beings wherever they live and whatever they believe. There are confident New Zealanders, shy Americans and exuberant Chinese.

Body language is a communication tool and when harnessed, can greatly assist relationship building. However, as with everything in life, it is best to maintain some sense of equilibrium, especially when interpreting another person's gestures. When the client holds her arms around her body is making a culturally defined statement or resisting your message? Perhaps what she is really indicating is that the air conditioning is up too high and she is feeling slightly chilled - a message that women all over the world can relate to!

Footnotes
1. Open For Inspection by Deborah Vanderhoek and Joy Aimée